Clash of the idiots! Season one
by Ranger24
Summary: Caboose has won!
1. Chapter 1

Chpter one: Welcome to the ring!

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

The scene begins in a big staduim with the lights dimmed.

Ranger24: LADIES AND GENTELMEN!! WELCOME TO **CLASH OF THE IDIOTS!!**

Crowd: YAHH!!!

Ranger24: Allow me to introduce or contenders. By the way I'm you host Ranger24!

Spot light shines on one of six entrances.

Ranger24: In this corner hailing from cohauge Rhode Island! Weghing in at over two hundred pounds! I give you! **PETER GRIFFEN**!!

Peter: Hi everyone!

Crowd: Hi Peter!

Ranger24: In this corner! Haling from endsvilie! Weiging in at around seventy five pounds! I give you! **BILLY**!!

Billy: DAHH!

Crowd: YEAH!!

Ranger24: Next hailing from Peach creek! Weighing at over one hundred pounds! Ed!

Ed: Hello light.

Crowd: ...

Ranger24: Okay the final contestant! I give you! Hailing from Blood guluch! Weighing in at over half a ton wearing hhis regulation blue armor! I give you! Cabbosse!

Cabbosse: Hello I am happy to be here. Where is my orange juice.

Crowd: Who is he again.

Ranger24: Cabbosse! Check in tomorrow for match one! Review please!


	2. Chapter 2

CHapter two: Background checks.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Ranger24: Hello everyone Today I'm here to give some more insight into the contender known as Cabbosse. Cortana roll the film.

Cortana: Fine.

A film starts.

NArrator: Hello everyone today I am here to tell you a little about Micheal J Cabbosse.

Cabbosse had a troubled youth involving family issuise. His father and mother argued. And while they did so he would go to his happy place and then he would start dancing.

When he was eight-teen he was shipped out with the blue army to blood guluch where he joined Private's Church and Tucker. Church quickly grew to dislike Cabbosse espacilly for thhe fact that on day one he called Church's girlfriend a cow, got their flag stolen by a homo, and killed Church with a tank while trying to get the flag back.

Cabbosse fell in love with said tank by the name of sheila for the tank was intelgent. How ever she was put out of comisson constantly by being blown up.

Later he was used as target practice for free lance mercenary Tex who (ironicly) was Church's ex girlfriend. Then infected by an evil AI from said free lancer after she was killed. During an attempte to rescue her Church came back as a ghost. He poosed the red seargent but was shot by Cabosse again.

Church offically hates him. While Cabbosse has the misconception that Church want's to be his best friend. The Ai infection bussiness made him very mean. During a fire fight he lost a toe to Church. Then After Shelia was repaired he tried to restart the relation ship but a mexican robot by the name of Lopez got in the way. Then they found out...

Oh who am I kidding. Get your parents permission and goggle Red vs blue season 1 or 2 or 3 then if you like it go to season 4 and the most recent season five a Okay any questions? Good!


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: The first round!

Disclaimer I own nothing.

Ranger24: Ladies and gentlemen! Welcome to another episode of Clash of the idiots! Today we give you the first round match ups! Remember your votes count on who wins each fight! So I turn you over to the lady of the ring! Tifa Lockheart!

Tifa: Thanks Ranger24. Today'sMatch is bettween Ed of peach creek! Against Peter Griffen of Cohauge Rhode Island!

Crowd: YEAH!!

Tifa: Now I turn you over to Master Cheif Spartan 117 and Cloud Strife for their opoins on this match.

Chief: Thank you Tifa.

He turns to Cloud.

Chief: So Cloud who do you think is going to win this match?

Cloud: Well Peter is a bit smarter than Ed but he is slow but with that he makes up for in endurance. But powerful. It's like a grizzly bear and a siberan tiger going head to head. Ed's slimer, faster, and might by stronger. SO it's anyone's game here.

Chief: I'd agree with you on that one. Now let's turn it back over to Ranger24 for the start of the match.

Ranger24: Okay here we go.

He clears his throat.

Ranger24: Ladies and gentlemen! Tonight we present to you a battle of two titains! In this corner weighing in at two hundred and seventy-five pounds! I give you PETER GRIFFEN!!

The crowd roars with excitement as Peter enters the ring.

Chris Griffen: Go dad!

Meg: HE can't hear you.

Chris: GO DAD!!!!!

Ranger24: And in this corner weighing in at one hundred and fifty pounds! I give you! ED!

The crowd cheers again as Ed enter's the ring with Eddy and Double D at his side.

Eddy: Okay lumpy watch the punches and aim for the gut.

Edd: Eddy there is a lot of mass their his punch might just bounce off.

Eddy: Shut up sock head.

The two combatants take of their robes. Peter looks like he's wearing Rocky Balboa's out fit from the rematch in Rocky 3 with mister T. Ed is just wearing a diaper. Donald enter's the ring as the Referee.

Donald: OKay no low blows and watch the rapid punches. We don't want any serious injuries.

Peter: Okay.

Ed: COOKIES AND MILK!!!

Donald: Okay when I give the signal you can start.

Ranger24: Here we go folks next chapter the fight starts! Remember your votes decide who wins or I cast the tie breaker! Review please!


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4 Round one is over!

Discalimer: I own nothing.

Ed charges Peter!

Ed: Prepare to meet your maker!!!

He lunges only to meet Peter's fist throwing hm out of the ring and into the wall.

Donald: ONE!

Eddy: COme on Ed get up!

Ed: I see stars.

Donald: TWO!

Edd: Ed!!

Donald: THREE!!

Eddy: NO!

Donald: Your out!

Ranger24: And it's over! The winner is! Peter with one punch!

Eddy: I demand a rematch!

Ranger24: That's it for this week! Next week! Billy vs Caboose!!


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5: Round one match 2!

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Ranger24: Okay folks it's time for match two Caboose vs Billy!

Crowd: YEY!!!!!!!!

Ranger24: Now I turn you over two Cloud and Master Chief for their take on the contenders.

Cloud: THanks Ranger.

CHief: You know Cloud on this fight it seems really sad.

Cloud: WHy is that?

Chief: Caboose is less known to the readers than Billy is. If this was a fair fight Caboose would wipe the floor with Billy.

Cloud: Yeah Billy is such a jerk Caboose would be angry in ten seconds and beat the living...

CHief: Whoa Cloud we can't curse here.

Cloud: Yeah your right but it dosen't seem fair for Caboose.

Chief: Well said back to you Ranger.

Ranger24: Okay folks I'll send you down to the ring!

We see the blues trying to peep talk Caboose.

Church: Don't worry Caboose you can do this.

Tucker: Yeah right! Knowing how few people know about us Caboose won't have very much in the way of support.

Tex: Oh quit making Caboose nervous Tucker.

Tucker: Tex I don't think Caboose can be nervous. Now excuase me.

He runs over to the betting box.

Tucker: Put it all on Billy.

Tex and Church walk over.

Church: Tucker come on this is Caboose. The guy who blew me up with a tank, shot the guy I was possesing in the head, beat up a bunch of religous nuts, and managed to carry a two ton bomb the size of a bowling ball for over an hour.

Tex: You put all your money on Caboose didn't you.

Church: Yeah... Kind of.

A few minutes later Billy and Caboose enter the ring.

Donald: No low blows and watch the rapid punchs now go out there and give these readers a show!

Ranger24: VOte now on who wins!


	6. Chapter 6

Ranger24: Another story I have to finish.

* * *

Chapter: Caboose vs Billy!

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Billy leapt forward and landed a hard one in Caboose's sending Caboose into the ropes.

Caboose: That was not very nice.

Billy: Don't you talk to me!

Caboose: You are a very mean person. I don't think I like you.

Billy starts beating the crap out of Caboose!

Church: Caboose get mad!

Caboose: How?

Church: Pretend he pimp slapped your mom!

Tex: And raped Shelia!

Caboose: He what!!! THAT MAKES ME ANGRY!!! YEARGH!!!

He grabs Billy by the nose and rips it off!

Caboose (Speaking in a deep menaceing voice): My name is Micheal J Caboose! And I hate Babies!

Didi (from the Rugrats): I'm out of here!

Suddenly those religuos nuts from red vs blue stand up in the crowd.

Red Zealot: IT's the beast! The anti flag! Come to live among us and rule us for seven years! The end is neigh!

Suddenly he falls dead as Church shoots him with his sniper rifle while Tex kills the rest of them.

Caboose proceeds to begin to beat Billy to death with his own nose! Suddenly Octavious enters.

Octavious: Jesus died because you wrote this peice of...

Before he could do anything Caboose throws Billy's nose like a boomerang which bounces off the lights and fly's right into Octavious's neck killing him instantly. Finnaly Billy submits and is sent to a medical hospital for emergency skin grafting, nose transplant, eye replacment, bone repair, nd seven cuntusions in his liver and kidneys.

Ranger: Wow! Talk about an upset! The winner is Caboose!

Caboose: I will eat your unhappyness!

Crowd: ...

Church runs onto the mat with Tex.

Church: Caboose I never thought I'd say this but thank god your a moron! Because I just made a hell of a lot of money!

Tucker: NO way! I lost a bet! Thanks a lot Caboose!

Caboose: You are welcome Tucker. I am happy. Church likes me now!

Ranger: Caboose congrats on making it to the final round!

* * *

Ranger24: Read and review! Next time it's the preperations for the final round! Caboose vs Peter! LEt's get ready to crown a moron king! And our runner up! Again! Read and Reveiw! Peace out! And thanks for all the fish! 


	7. Chapter 7

Ranger24: Okay just need to end this.

* * *

Chapter 7: The final battle!

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Back in the arena the crowd is cheering wildly! Ranger stands up.

Ranger: Ladies and gentlemen! Tonight we have the final battle of the entire contest to titans of battle! I turn you over now to the lady of the ring Tifa Lockheart!

Crowd cheers zoom in on Tifa.

Tifa: Thanks Ranger. Tonight we have the final battle of this adtion of clash of the idoits! Both of our compeditors have battled their way past their opponets to reach the final round! Ladies and gentlemen in this corner! Weighing in at five hundred pounds with the armor! Micheal J. Caboose!

Caboose stands up and waves his hand.

Caboose: Hi everyone! I am Caboose! And I want to win!

Crowd cheers and some boo.

Tifa: And in this corner! Weighing it at three hundred and fifty pounds! All the way from Rhode Island! Peter Griffen!

Peter stands up and waves at the crowd.

Peter: Hey everyone great to be here!

Tifa: I now turn you over to Cloud Strife and Master Chief Spartan 117!

Crowd cheers!

Cloud: Hey folks I'm Cloud strife.

Master Chief: And I'm Master Chief Spartan 117.

Cloud: You know Chief I'm not sure at all whos going to win this match.

Master Chief: True Caboose and Peter are both very popular characters this is anyones fight.

Cloud: So its all up to the reviewers?

Master Chief: Yep.

Cloud: Well then thats about all we have to say here. Back to you Ranger!

Ranger: Well let's get this started.

Donald climbs onto the mat.

Donald: Alwight I want a clean fight. No low wlows and watch the rapid punches.

Donald steps back and Caboose and Peter stand up ready to fight.

Church: Go Caboose! We've got our next mortgae on the base riding on you!

Tex: You bet the base?

Church: Yeah.

Tucker: And I had to use what was left of cash to try and get a decent size bet on Caboose.

Over with Peter.

Lois: Peter becarefull in there.

Peter: Don't worry Lois I have something he dosen't. I have the eye of the tiger.

Lois: Really?

Peter: Well actually its the eye of the Lyxn but thats pretty close.

Peter is in his Rocky out fit. Caboose takes off his helmet revealing his short blonde hair and tiny blue eyes. Hes only wearing blue under wear and a BLUE ARMY t-shirt.

Donald: Fighters ready!

Peter hopps on both of his feet.

Donald: Fighters set!

Caboose just checks the clock.

Donald: FIGHT!

The two of them charge forward at one another!

* * *

Ranger24: Get some votes in and we'll find out who wins! Read and review! 


	8. Chapter 8

Ranger24: Finally ending this fic!

Chapter 8: Final Brawl!

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Peter and Caboose clashed together throwing random punches at eachother surging back and forth! Very soon both had black eyes, bloody noses, split chins!

Church: Come on Caboose!

Tucker: We need some mood music!

Tucker pulls out his Ipod and plugs it into some speakers!

Tucker: Here we go!

"**Headstrong**" starts playing as Peter Caboose circle eachother!

Circling your, circling your, circling your head,

Contemplating everything you ever said

Caboose reengages the fight punching Peter in the side of the head!

_Now I see the truth, I got doubt_

_A different motive in your eyes and now I'm out_

Peter grabbs Cabose by the shoulder and begins punching him repeatedly in the head!

_See you later_

_I see your fantasy, you want to make it a reality paved in gold_

_See inside, inside of our heads (yeah)_

_Well now that's over_

Suddenly Caboose catches Peter's hand in mid punch!

_I see your motives inside, decisions to hide_

_(Fuck!)_

Caboose knees Peter in the gut! Then begins pounding him back across the ring!

_Back off I'll take you on!_

_Headstrong to take on anyone_

_I know that you are wrong!_

_Headstrong we're headstrong!_

_Back off I'll take you on!_

_Headstrong to take on anyone!_

_I know that you are wrong and this is not where you belong!_

Caboose does a take down and Peter topples to the ground bouncing the ring! Caboose kicks him into the air then some how does that same tiajutsu Sasuke, Lee, and Naruto all do!

_I can't give everything away!_

_I won't give everything away!_

Peter pulls himself to his feet and shoves Caboose back!

Ranger: MY GOD THIS IS INTENSE!

_Conclusions manifest, your first impressions got to be your very best_

_I see you're full of shit, and that's alright._

_That's how you play, I guess you'll get through every night_

_Well now that's over._

Peter forces Caboose back to the ropes pounding away at the love able moron! THe crowd is going nuts some screaming for the fight to stop others can't get enough!

_I see your fantasy, you want to make it a reality paved in gold!_

Caboose shoves Peter off him!

_See inside, inside of our heads (yeah)_

_Well now that's over_

Peter throws a punch but Caboose ducks it!

_I see your motives inside, decisions to hide_

Caboose slams his fist into Peter's gut then smashes him in the face!

_Back off I'll take you on!_

_Headstrong to take on anyone_

_I know that you are wrong!_

_Headstrong we're headstrong!_

_Back off I'll take you on!_

_Headstrong to take on anyone!_

_I know that you are wrong and this is not where you belong!_

Caboose sends Peter spiraling into the ropes!

I can't give everything away!

I won't give everything away!

Peter suddenly ripes the ropes off and tries to use them as whips! Caboose tries to block them with his arms!

_I know, I know all about_

_I know, I know all about_

_I know, I know all about_

One of the ropes gains purchase on Caboose's right forearm! Caboose suddenly pulls Peter towards him!

_I know, I know all about your motives inside, and your decision to hide..._

Caboose slams his arm into Peter's face sending him to the floor! Peter rolls to his feet but Caboose strats kicking at him! Peter barely blocking each blow!

_Back off I'll take you on!_

_Headstrong to take on anyone_

_I know that you are wrong!_

_Headstrong we're headstrong!_

_Back off I'll take you on!_

_Headstrong to take on anyone!_

_I know that you are wrong and this is not where you belong!_

One kick lands on Peter's face sending him against the remaining ropes and Caboose continunes his striking spree!

_I can't give everything away!_

_I won't give everything away!_

Caboose final lands one last hit and Peter crumples to his knees!

_I can't give everything away!_

_I won't give everything away!_

Peter falls flat on his face as the song ends! Donald rushes forward.

Donald: One! Two! Three! Your out!

Chief: It's over! The fight is over! Caboose is the undisputed king of all morons!

Cloud: And now he has the brain cell count to match!

Caboose glances about.

Caboose: What happened? All I remember is a very mean kitten. My throat hurts. I feel Dizzy.

Tifa slaps the belt on him!

Tifa: Congratulations Caboose!

Caboose: Still feel dizzy.

Tifa: Now what are you going to do?

Caboose: I feel like takinga nap now.

Caboose falls on his face right there and falls asleep. Church sighs.

Church: We'll take care of him.

Suddenly Flame rising enters!

Flame Rising: This has got to be the ...

CRACK!!

Church shoots the flamer through the groin with his sniper rifle!

Church: HEY! I GOT HIM! I mean. I knew this sniper rifle was awesome.

Ranger: I would like to thank all our readers and voters. Thanks for reading. Good night. I would also like to thank Ace 7 for copying down this song onto her profile. Really helpful.


End file.
